Holding a Restorative Conversation

At Ashhurst School an appropriate member of school staff (commonly the classroom teacher) will deal with low-level conflict before it escalates and models best practice approach for the student with whom they are conversing. For this to be effective it needs to be a planned approach that incorporates the language and structure outlined below.

Thorsbone and Blood 2013, state that "relying on one-on-one chats alone is rarely effective. It may take many of these conversations-this is a process to teach young children how to think about their behaviour. At a neurological level, we now understand that we are creating new neural pathways in young brains, and there is no quick fix to this!"

Restorative Practice Kete Book 2

As a school we recognise this is not a fast process and time will be required to support staff to operate in this manner. If staff need time during class to facilitate these discussions, or if it occurs after a break time, teachers can contact the school SMT who will relieve the teacher of classroom duty so teachers can complete the conversation.

Phases of the Restorative Conversation

Preparation

For a low-key, informal conversation, preparation can be very brief:

Am I ready to talk?
Do I know what I will ask them?
Are they ready to talk?
Where is the appropriate place to have the talk?

Participation

Discussions with the student, with the adult asking questions in a way that engages the student and elicits as much response as possible to address:

What has happened?
How is this behaviour affecting others?
What do you need to do to fix things now?
What support do you need to make sure this doesn’t happen again today and in the future?

Follow up

Is the opportunity to touch base with the student (or students). This part of the process ensures that those who have caused the harm have understood the agreement to repair the harm with those affected. It also creates an opportunity to affirm the efforts made by the student to repair the harm and to consider next steps if the terms of the agreement have not been met.

What has worked well?
What do you need more support with?
If the obligations of the agreement have not been met within the agreed time frame, what happens now?

Often the follow up is neglected in the process. It is critical that the teacher follows up when stated. This will be required to be entered in the school SMS system.

Three Phases of a restorative conversation

The art of asking questions - "Why not why?"

Everyone has their own favourite ways of asking questions. However, asking “Why?” can be a barrier to opening a dialogue with another person.

“Why?” can sound like a challenge or an accusation. The other person may feel they need to justify their behaviour or can become suspicious and defensive. A student may not know why they behaved in the way they did; the answer is more likely to be “I don’t know” than a response that will lead to a Restorative Conversation. The best strategy is to try to establish the reason for the behaviour without asking directly.

View questions as an opportunity to open discussion and encourage thought rather than simply a test or challenge designed to get the correct response.

McQueen 2010

This material is sourced from the Ministry of Education , Positive Behaviour for learning Kete, Book 2

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